A Walk on the Wild Side

This afternoon, I spent some time with a few packs of wolves. I stumbled across a site that is dedicated to a private wolf sanctuary only a few minutes from my home. Of course, I was unable to rest until I had made arrangements to visit. In order to protect these wonderful animals from people that might harm or harass them, the address is not on the site and all tours are by appointment.

There were several different types of wolves present, including some that are almost extinct. One of the most fascinating sights was a litter of 10 week old wolf cubs who were doing their best to copy everything the adult wolves were doing.

If you are planning to be in central PA, I urge you to put this on your list as a "must" visit!

Asshole or Nice Guy?

This morning, I caught the end of an interview of Shani Davis on the Today show. There was a brief reference to some statement that Shani had released that referred to the general public as being prejudiced. The reason for this was because such notice had been made of Shani's lack of visible excitement after winning a gold medal. I thought I had heard something about people likening Shani to the fabled "sullen black man". I wanted to make sure of this, so I went on a search to find this statement by Shani Davis...more on that in a moment.

I watched the race that Shani Davis won. Go ahead and call me a geek, but I was cheering like crazy. I was so excited that a young man that grew up in poor circumstances with a single mother had made it so far. I was able to identify with Shani because of that. The fact that he had become the first black athlete to win an individual gold medal at the Winter Olympics was just icing on the cake. I was dumbfounded when I watched his interview following the race. Like it or not, he did act like some sullen, pissed off, rotten attitude asshole...no matter what color his skin. I wondered at the time (and still do) if Shani suffers from Asperger's syndrome.

So...I went on a search for Shani's statement. I found a site that claims to be officially Shani's. Imagine my shock when I found an announcement that starts with this:

U.S. Speedskating and Chad Hedrick need to be exposed for their satanic plot.

WHAT THE FUCK? Is this shit for real? When I thought it couldn't get any more outrageous, I find this at the end:

Hey, guys, there's a new game in the U.S.!! Destroy the Black Athlete

Hmm...I vote for asshole.

Thrashin' Thursday!

Someone please tell me what the flying fuck this "curling" shit is supposed to be? How is this an Olympic sport? If you don't break a sweat while doing it, it is not a fucking sport! The least they could do is hurl the damn things at each other and make it a bit more exciting.

Um...news break. Please, please explain to me why a fugly looking asshole thinks it would be perfectly okay to dress up like a woman when he is an elementary school teacher? Kids are screwed up enough these days without someone bringing this shit into an elementary school. Hey "Lily", wanna make a real statement? Go teach high school looking like that...you fucking freak. Let's see how "accepted" you'll be. Oh, and before anyone jumps my ass about intolerance, I don't give a flaming SHIT what you do in your sex life as long as it doesn't involve kids or small furry animals. BUT...when you first teach little kids as a man, you don't return as a woman to fuck up their little minds. Public school does NOT mean "anything goes". Keep your sex life out of the school.

*Sigh* George, what the FUCK were you thinking? Man, I love you...I worked my ass off for you during each election, but I just can't figure out what kind of crack you were smoking when you thought we wouldn't care if you turned over American ports to Arabs. If I were you, I'd hand Dick a shotgun and let him go hunting, again. It might get the spotlight off this colossal fuck-up.

Goddess gem: How do you reason with a 70 lb., 8 month old puppy? He can't grasp the fact that he is too big to be a lap dog.

Get off your ass and DO this!

Someone from the PoliceHub.com forum posted a site that is doing a program called Hero to Hero that is a morale booster for the troops. They are asking for Police, Corrections, EMS and Fire members to donate the shirts off their backs to the soldiers. You know all of those department shirts that sit in your drawer? Take a few of them, write an inspirational and/or supportive message and send it to the Hero2Hero folks to send to our troops. Also, you don't have to be an emergency worker to get involved; if you have a shirt with your town name on it, write a message and send that! They can also use monetary donations to help with packing and postage.
This is such a small thing to do and it will mean so much. Help me by spreading the word on this program.

Groundpiggies, Rat-Bastard Squirrels, and the tortures of running.

Any one of you that is one of those freaks that lives for running ridiculous distances without a realization that you are insane, please lean closer to the screen for TG. That's it, c'mere, just a little closer....

URGGGGHR! Yeah, bitch...I have you by your obnoxious nose/ear/hair/nipple/whatever I could grab! Listen to me, very carefully...you rotten fucks have something seriously wrong with you that you ENJOY this running shit. You all need your heads bashed together until you wake up to reality!

Holy cunt-monkeys...I HATE to run...but, yes, I am still doing it and no...I have still not smoked. I didn't think it was possible for me to become any more of a flaming bitch than I already was, but I've managed to exceed even my own expectations.

Yeah, I'm so proud.

Next issue: Hey, Octarara and Punxetawny (or however the fuck you spell it) PA! Don't you think it might be time to go out and trap yourself a new, fat groundpiggy to replace that dead, moth-eaten thing that you drag out of the cellar every 2nd of February? Here's a clue: when even small children are freaked out by the disgustingness of Phil the groundpiggy, it is time to cremate the little furry fuck and get ya a new one. In fact, I have the perfect specimen for you. I have one of the fattest, roly-poly groundpiggies that you could ever ask for...and the best part is, the damn thing is so freaking stupid. He waddles his fat ass across my yard at what he thinks is Warp Factor 3 with his huge hindquarters bouncing all over the place and dragging him to one side or another. He finally slams into the bottom of the deck where he proceeds to get stuck because his fat ass can't fit going out. When the dumb shit does this, I get treated to a chorus of groundpiggy obscenities. I'm actually glad the prick is stuck by that point.

Oh...before any animal lovers write to me so they can bitch, let me say this:

Fuck you and your whiny-ass, tree-hugging, paint-throwing, wussy-ass bullshit!
To make sure it is clear: FUCK YOU, TWICE!

I know it doesn't sound like it, but I really do love my groudpiggy. It's the squirrels that need to die a screaming death while choking on their own blood. If you saw the destruction that the mangy little fucks did, you would understand. These little bastards do a few interesting tricks. They chew the hell out of anything important that you might lock away and they can queeze into. Thier second special trick is to unfailingly decide to sacrifice one of themselves on any night that you have some special TV watching planned. One of them will throw themselves into a trasformer causing it to explode and plunge several neighborhoods into darkness. If you listen closely, you can hear them tittering while the husbands and fathers are howling their frustration at the ceiling.
The final special squirrel trick is that they are constantly horny. I don't know why the the phrase "fucks like bunnies" got started. I've never seen bunnies doing the nasty (except for my step-mother's freak of nature "Bun-Bun" that assraped a cat...but that's another story.) I have seen squirrels humping each other on a regular basis.
If it isn't bad enough that the little shits are constantly fucking, they also get help from our neighborhood fuckwit: Squirrel Man.
Squirrel Man imports more squirrels into the neighborhood. He traps them at his father's house and brings them to this development so that he can have a "Born Free" moment. I am accepting any and all suggestions to stop this moron. So far I have:

• impaled dead squirrels on the tree in front of my house, placed "just so" for when Squirrel Man takes his walk past my house.
• I have lined up the dead furry fucks on top of the trasformer with their heads hanging backwards so that they can fix Squirrel Man with a death gaze.

I guess the next thing is to put on my redneck gear, walk over to Squirrel Man's house next time I see him outside and start the following conversation:

Me: Hey Squirrel Man! Can you bring me some new squirrels soon? If you can, bring some faster ones...this group didn't do very well at target practice and I got'em all."

USA USA USA USA USA USA (say it with me, y'know you want to...)

I am unashamedly a huge fan of the Olympics. It may be because I can clearly recall special moments, times shared by my family as we watched and cheered on our athletes. It also may be because my father had been asked to be on the US Olympic Weightlifting team in the 1960's. I know that the first time I ever watched an ice hockey game, it was the BIG game between the USA and USSR. I can still see Herb Brooks standing behind the players' bench and the "dogpile" on the ice when we won. I remember seeing a tiny Russian gymnast that performed as if gravity did not affect her, receiving perfect scores.
Okay...okay...okay, I confess that I love watching the figure skating. Like most little girls, I was fascinated by my peers that were so perfect that they were able to compete on a world stage. This was also my first real glimpse at people from other countries. Remember, it wasn't so long ago that anything to do with the USSR was swathed in secrecy. To a small child, the idea that an entire country of people live behind an "iron curtain" is something that is frightening and fascinating.

(Okay....this is fucking IT! Blogger ate another damn post. FUCK.)

Addiction, Rocking out and being a bitch....


I finally did it....I've quit the nasty. I am an ex-smoker.

It wasn't something that I scheduled. I just decided to do it. And, yes, I'm doing it cold turkey. One thing that helps is that I have a "bite guard" for TMJ. I wear that constantly and it helps. I'm running...and yes, it sucks.

I.
Fucking.
Hate.
To.
Run.
Period.

I want to CUT people that can run their asses off. They are usually such SMUG bastards. Makes me want to stick my foot out as they motor past me.

I traded one addiction for another. There's a group of my online friends that have become hooked on poker. We live for freerolls. Freerolls are poker games that are free to enter and you can win money.

I think we need to join Freerolls Anonymous...before the cyber leg-breakers find us.

Goddess gem: Thank God for my mp3 player. There's something therapeutic about screaming the words to "I'm the Only One" by Melissa Ethridge.
Simon would not be sending my tone-deaf ass to Hollywood.

YAY STEELERS!!!

Thank God that SOMEONE is winning in Pittsburgh!

Boy, are we fucked!

It's a crying shame that we are quickly losing a national treasure. There is a generation of American women that has always personified grace, culture and courage. No matter how ugly life could become we were always able to look to these women to see how we should act in our own lives. Jackie Kennedy Onassis was one of them and now, we have lost another...Coretta King. These women went through some of the most awful things that occur in life and still managed to do it in a way that is still held up as a standard to the rest of us. When I think about the pressures that Mrs. King had to face as the very public wife of a black leader at the forefront of the civil rights movement, it makes my angst over having to blaze trails as a female police officer seem so trivial. You have to remember that a large amount of ignorant crackers thought nothing of physically or verbally attacking black people during that time period. In some areas, it was an accepted and "socially correct" behavior. It is something that really boggles the mind when contrasted with today. I truly believe that it had to be more difficult to be the wife of MLK because of the added pressure of being a woman and having to respond to morons in a ladylike manner. They don't make 'em like Coretta King and Jackie O., anymore, and that is a loss for all of us.
This point was never so glaringly evident than with the debacle at the State of the Union speech, this week. I don't care how you feel about our President, when you are attending an important function within a forum that represents this country's most serious duties, you accord the proper respect to which it is due. I'm not referring to Cindy Sheehan...fuck her, I expected her to act like some moron. However, I certainly expected more from the wife of a US congressman!
Lady, I don't care if it WAS a display of support for our troops...what fucking possessed you to think that it was perfectly okay to wear a T-SHIRT to the State of the Union speech? Does your husband's congressional district consist of nothing but trailer parks and Jerry Springer watching white trash? You'd certainly better hope so, because that's about the only people that should be voting for him. You need to be apologizing to his constituents for being such an embarassing, stupid twat. It reminds me of the dumbasses that would show up to court in a t-shirt, jeans and baseball hat and then wonder why the judge tore them a dozen more assholes. It's pretty obvious from your behavior that you have little respect for the things that your husband is supposed to be representing (oh yeah...he's just as fucking bad for publically ranting about your freedom of speech), I sincerely hope that the voters give you a new shirt:
"I went to Congress and acted like an ass...and all I got was this stupid t-shirt."

Each of you probably knows a woman that typifies that wonderful, classy generation: a mother, grandmother, aunt, friend or even mentor. Do me a favor...call, visit or write to her. Tell her that she is a true treasure- before it is too late.

Goddess gem: Granny, I miss you so.

FUCK YOU, BLOGSPOT!

Blogspot ate my list of the next 50. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the rotten program eats this post, too. So, Blogspot...simply because you sucketh to the infinite power, I am awarding you with a special Friday ass-whipping. If you possessed an anal cavity, I would have my foot implanted up to my hip.

That is all.

Goddess wonders.... Hmm, it must truly be a sign that my beloved Pens are playing REALLY badly when I don't even get horny watching, anymore.